Hiatus Days Two and Three - Texts

Not the mobile but one like it

“I also contacted people using the useful “text to many” system (not all of which I’ve kept).  The replies say a lot about my various friends and relations.”

Thursday 27 March 2025

09.19 Text to many – Ward round done.  Today they are going to clean the wound, put on a vacuum dressing and start antibiotics.  I’ll be with him for that.  Tomorrow operation.  I have a Zbed, books and knitting.

09.26 Mrs Eft – Chin up.  If you’d care for a visit or wd like something fetching from home Just call or text.x

09.33 to Mrs Eft – There’s nothing I need thanks bar hope, information and an idea of when we’ll be able to go home.  DrE says I should get 4n smuggled in.

15.23 to Middlesister – Antibiotic pills started lunchtime but I couldn’t see what was on the box.

19.49 Bazoukiboy – Been round.  Seems fine, seems more concerned about your sanity.  Asked if either of you needed anything.  He said no T could get it.  Hope you are managing.  As ever if you want anything, shout.

19.55 to Bazoukiboy – It’s not my sanity he needs to worry about.  It’s my patience

Friday 28 March 2025

08.44 to The Niece – Happy Birthday for yesterday.  Ferretfingers to theatre this afternoon.  The boys had chickenpox more than once.  This too will pass.  Love to everybody xxxxx

08.57 to Middlesister – I had a poo!

09.02 Middlesister – Well done, not easy situation 2 pass 1 or 2 in! xx

09.10 to Mrs Eft – Ferretfingers to theatre this afternoon.  It looks as if we’ll be here a few more days.

09.15 to Many – Ferretfingers to theatre this afternoon.  It looks as if we’ll be here a few more days.  Thunderthighs great at bringing stuff from home.  I’m OK

09.34 to DrE – Given the wound on his thigh, is StRoch the right one for a poisoned ankle?

13.11 Dr E – Servatius of Tongeren is patron saint of ankle wounds.  How are things today?

17.50 The Niece – Hope you’re looking after yourself as best as you can whilst looking after Ferretfingers.  This too will pass xxxxx

The Niece’s two year old twins had chicken pox.

The family bowels tend to immobility when under stress or away from home.

Hiatus Day One - Emails and Texts

As well as emails and facebook I also contacted people using the useful “text to many” system (not all of which I’ve kept).  The replies say a lot about my various friends and relations.

26/03/2025 11.21 email to Cousin Daisy, Middlesister and 28 others

Hello All

No blog today and I'm afraid Ferretfingers’ ankle is in a bad state.

We went to the Freeman this morning to have the dressing changed and the wound is badly infected.

The swabs they took when they took the metal out of his ankle "grew something" in microbiology.

There is a bed available for him in Ward 22 of the RVI this afternoon and he will probably be operated on tomorrow.

I am going to stay with him as before so the next job is packing overnight bags for an indefinite period.

I'll leave how I'm feeling to your imagination.

If you've a mind to light candles or say a few Novena's of the Rosary ...

TTFN

Ben

xxx

2.48 email from Mrs Quilt

So sorry to hear this.  Good luck to Ferretfingers.  Loads of love and best wishes to you.  Won't be the Rosary but will be "Remember Gracious Virgin Mary....." etc.  Do you need to borrow anything that would help your stay be more comfortable?

Love and virtual hugz

Mrs Q

Texts Wednesday 26 March

13.35 Mrs Eft – Such bad news re Ferretfingers.  I am available to fetch, carry, taxi, visits etc.  Just let me know.  Love to Ferretfingers and big hugs to you.xxx

14.14 Mrs Eft – Oh poor Ben, you don’t deserve this.  Especially after you coughed up the money you owe me.

14.39 To Middlesister - No ghosts in the RVI.  Ferretfingers has 2 tablets so he can watch tv and be on facebook.  I’m sagging.  His bp is 102/79.

14.51 Middlesister – Bp good.  Presume tablet was painkiller or antibiotic.  Found my Rosary beads.  No ghosts :-) xx

14.53 To Middlesister – Tablet as in computer :-)

15.00 Middlesister – I’m not too tech savvy.  Brain in medical mode.  Try to flop like rabbits’ ears.xx

19.11 Bigsister – So sorry to hear the news about Ferretfingers.  You must be devastated.  Wasn’t sure about when would be best to call, so decided to text.  Thinking of you Ben and hoping all goes well xx

19.34 To Bigsister – Texting is best until we get back home.  Sometimes the light at the end of a tunnel is an oncoming train. 

27/03/2025

16.16 Sister-in-Law – Middlesister is updating us on Ferretfingers’ treatment etc.  I’m afraid I can’t say a rosary or novena for you but I will be putting Ferretfingers name down on the intercessions list, and will keep you in my thoughts at the same time.  Take as much good care of yourself as you are able to xx

Middlesister phoned my mobile every day of our stay in hospital, then kept the rest of our siblings and niece up to date.  She is a retired nurse so could explain things and answer any questions far better, and with more good grace, than I could have done.  Knowing she was doing this was a great help.

It was also good to have someone to vent safely to, and just have a much needed giggle.

“Ghosts” refers to the fact that I sometimes find being in the Freeman hospital quite problematic.  It is where Phil passed away and occasionally a sudden memory transports me back to that time and I have had to drag myself back to face today’s trauma.

RETURNING FROM THE HIATUS

I’m afraid things didn’t go quite to plan after the removal of the plates and pins from Ferretfingers’ ankle.

The next few blogs will explain why and what happened next

They are taken from the journal I keep by my bedside and carry around with me when I’m away from home.  It helps me to put things and my feelings about them in writing.  The alternative is screaming (not always possible), punching someone or something (not recommended) or homicide (not allowed).

As Oscar Wilde's Gwendolyn said in The Imporance Of Being Earnest "I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train."

Please see The History of Ferretfingers’ Ankle

Thursday 27 March 2025 08.00 - Royal Victoria Infirmary

Yesterday, two weeks after the operation, at 9am we went back to the Freeman to have the dressing changed.

The nurse cut off the old dressing, said “Eww” and swiftly wrapped the sterile sheet around Ferretfingers’ leg.

Sadly she wasn’t  swift enough to prevent me from seeing it.

The operation wound looked like wet spam with a long yellow line and was dripping.

The sisters and consultant were fetched.

They all said "Ew" too.

Photographs were taken and emailed to colleagues.

The wound was gently cleaned, rebandaged, and we were sent to Xray and Room 17; blood samples were taken.

After not too long a wait the consultant came back and said “There will be a bed for you in the RVI this afternoon.  Go home, give him lunch, get everything ready and take him in.”

As we walked in the door the phone rang.

It was middle sister “Oh you sound down.”

So at least I could get some of it off my chest.

I found the number for the Mining Institute’s librarian and rang her.   

She passed her mobile over to Fester who asked if he should come home.

What The Actual F!?!

Then I emailed everyone who I thought should know.

And Facebooked.

And did some admin that couldn’t wait.

Then Fester came home and made Ferretfingers’ lunch; first wingeing that there was no bread.

Left me entirely to my own devices.

I really could have done with some support and sympathy.

A hug for Christsake.  “Oh poor you, that must have been hard.” Something like that.

FUCK ALL IS WHAT I GOT.

I’m sure he’s feeling it too but it’s as if I can cope with everything so get on with it.

What he’ll say in his defence is “Oh you never asked.”

But maybe perhaps you don’t need to be asked to offer care and sympathy.

He does this through bars of chocolate which is all very well but I actually need someone at my back giving me a soft place to fall.

I appreciate he believes I’m strong but once in a while I wish I didn’t have to be.   

I have no one to lean on.  I am mothering three men.  I want my mum.

Anyway…

Here we are all ready and waiting for them to wash out the wound; debrade the bone and God knows what else.

God also knows when we’ll get home.

Some of the above may seem disloyal but please remember, dear reader, that I was under considerable strain when writing it.

Keep The Home Fires Burning

From Facebook Archives

25 March 2014 at 22:48

I think I may have passed my celtic pyromania onto my sons.

I've been so cold and miserable recently I finally gave in and laid a fire in our newly installed grate (using the bits of waste timber from the house renovations). 

The boys were fascinated. 

Thunderthighs even left his laptop and tv, came down from the loft and spent most of the evening with me. 

Once it had got going we found all sorts of naughty unrecyclable rubbish to throw on - most of which went up really well (sorry ecowarriors but it's a toss up between our enjoyment and landfill).

Fester came out with a good point "You're warming your mind as well as your body." 

True the central heating works perfectly well but a fire is more convincing at making you feel warm.

And I could bore Thunderthighs rigid with stories of how his grandma and greatgrandma used to lay fires, the use of blazers and banking up coal fires with llidy*.

Hendlady  Did you make real toast on the fire??????

Bentonbag  No, the only toasting fork I have is my Granma's antique brass one with a Rabbie Burns handle.  Also I've not yet got back the knack of getting a good red glow going - not sure if I can manage it without coal.  But I'm on the look out for a poker and/or set of fire irons if anyone knows where I could pick some up.

Drummermant  You forgot to mention holiday cottages...

Bentonbag  "You can be sure of a warm welcome in Wales"

Being pedantic it was second homes rather than self-catering cottages which at least give some sort of income and a little work on change over weekends.  

(That's my guilt at using holiday cottages assuaged 😀)

Mrs KA  TRUE quality family time spent watching the flames dance. very theraputic too.

Maughans in Whitley bay sell companion sets but look in Featonby's first.

Mrs Poet  Warming your mind is lovely.

Mrs Frayarn  I used to love that at my grandpa's, making a fire and keeping it going, hypnotic and very relaxing.

Dulcima  Wouldn't be without my coal fire.  It warms the fabric of the house like no central heating ever does.

* I honestly don't know the English for this as it was what Granma always said.  'Coal dust' perhaps - tiny little bits of coal the size of grains of rice.  She would scrape the bottom of the coal shed and keep an enamel pie dish of llidy by the fire which she would use to 'bank it up'; to keep the fire going slowly and safely if she was going to be away from it for a while.