Don't Poke The Bear?

I’d almost forgotten about this…

Once upon a time I drafted a press release for a charity I volunteered for and emailed it to the CEO for approval and the ok to issue it.   

For some reason it was picked up by another member of the management team, a defrocked medic, who had obviously once been on an afternoon course on publicity.  They took it upon themselves to respond with an email reply containing the sort of questions, using long words, raised by people who think they know what they’re talking about.

Having spent several years in media liaison I was affronted.  I’d never really taken to the person in the first place, but had given them the benefit of the doubt and been polite.  However that ‘put the tin hat on it’ as my parents used to say.  A somewhat tart email went back to them, to which they replied “No fair”.

From Facebook Archives

25 May 2012 at 10:54

OK folks advice and opinion needed.

I believe someone where I volunteer is a patronising arrogant bullshitter whom I neither like nor trust.  This person has got right up my nose and I don't want them anywhere near the stuff I'm doing.  However I've just been informed, confidentially, that this person going to be "a lot more involved in everything".

Do I tell the organisation, and person, exactly what I think?

I could phrase 'patronising arrogant bullshitter' more tactfully but it expresses exactly how I feel.

Do I go all diva and tell them I'll carry on volunteering as long as I have nothing to do with that person?  Not really practical.

Do I soldier on feeling more and more disenchanted until there is an explosion?

Pink Kitchen  I think you need to talk to the organisation first, see their response, and then talk to the person if necessary.  You don't want to be unhappy in something you're doing voluntarily, and, should be enjoyable! x

Mr Littlefamily  I agree

Strawangel  Agree with Pink.  Bad move if you explode and head butt them! x

Bentonbag  lol Straw but, despite having some Scottish blood, I tend to go for the backhander or swift kick in the shins.

Mr Mull  I agree with Pink.  You'll have to say something and due to being told 'confidentially' that will have to be, initially, to the organisation.  Everybody needs to know where they stand or things will only get worse.  As regards to more tactful phrasing I think 'patronising' is perfectly acceptable and 'arrogant' may be too.  'Bullshitter' is probably not, but is easily replaced by something like 'all talk and no real delivery'.  I also think it may be worth trying to decide whether their arrogant and patronising approach is just to you or is to others as well.

Bentonbag  From listening to comments from the paid staff I don't think it's just me, the person doesn't seem to be aware of or appreciate their experience and skills.

Kentishlady  I agree with the others on this, but would like to say that the paid staff may be more wary of coming forward, having a wage to lose.  With you being unpaid, it does in fact put you in a stronger position.

Mr Mull  In that case it is even more important that you talk to the organisation, since this is something that is very unlikely to be sorted out between you.  I've always been amazed at how often people will be happy to grumble about 'x' persons attitude/approach but will never mention it to the people who might be able to do something about it.   

As Kentishlady says this may be that paid staff are worried about their jobs, but at some point the matter will have to be dealt with.

Pink Kitchen  If there's anyone you're particularly close to, and they feel the same, you could approach the matter together.  More voices united is likely to get more done.

The Squireen  You would not be able to work with this person and as a volunteer you may have to walk away, but tell them why you are walking away.

Bentonbag Thank you everyone

What happened was this…

 

Within a fortnight Stephen (Fester's Little Brother)’s sudden death, and all the aftermath, meant that I stopped being involved for over six months, so failed to raise the issue with anyone. During this time the person was promoted, provisionally for 6 months, to the position where he was “a lot more involved in everything".

 

Early the next year, when things got back to what I laughingly call normal, I went along to an open board meeting.  I was invited to join the board and, there being few of us, was co-opted onto the interview panel to either continue this person in position or recruit one of the external candidates.  

This provided an opportunity to read their CV.  I was impressed at their ability to accentuate the positive in their work history, making what I knew to be little more than student holiday work inputting data into system design and management.  I know one is meant to show the best side of oneself but this went beyond polishing and could have impressed people with less knowledge and experience.

 

It seems the rest of the board had similar opinions to mine. 

We recruited an external candidate, who proved to be exactly what was needed to bring the charity up to date, but still caring.. 

 

The person was so incensed on hearing the news they had to be literally escorted from the building.

Fortunately I wasn’t there to witness it.