New Phones

Sometime during the last ten years I replaced our cordless telephone-answering-machine with a system with three handsets: one with the base/answering machine in the living room, another in the office and the third in the loft.    

(Posh or what - a loo and a phone on every floor!) 

They could be used as an intercom.  Being able to speak to Thunderthighs without bellowing up the stairs has been a boon.  Sadly not one Fester has ever taken advantage of.

On Friday afternoon they all bleeped, the lights on the base went off and they ceased to function.  Fortunately I’ve kept a couple of old fashioned phones for powercuts and other contingencies.  I plugged one in so we could make and receive calls and had a look at Argos’ website. 

Although Thunderthighs never answers any outside calls on his he still wants a handset in his room.  I think it’s so he can hear when the phone rings and avalanche down to inquire who it is.

By bedtime on Friday I had bought the new phone system, been down to Sainsbury’s to collect it from Argos, put the batteries in the handsets and plugged them in to charge overnight. All the boys went out yesterday morning so I had peace and quiet to sort it all out.  By lunchtime the new phone and handsets were all installed and set up.

There was a day when you just plugged your phone into the wall.

Now you have to set the date and time, record a message, decide whether or not to select ‘eco’ (no me neither), adjust the volume of speaker/handset/ringtone etc etc.  

The phrase ‘too much choice’ springs to mind.

Each handset has a selection of 15 (fifteen!) ringtones.

 

The base, next to the tv in the living room (that's where the socket is) has a bright American drama type brring.

In order to test it I called the landline from my mobile in the kitchen with Fester.

“That’s no good” he says “I can’t hear that.”

I led him into the living room, picked up the handset, went into the ringtone menu and it played it again.

“That’s the one” says he triumphantly “I can hear that.”

“That’s the one that was ringing”.

The one next to Thunderthighs’ bed in the loft has a low trim-phone trill.

The one next to Fester's laptop in the office has an awful electronic version of Scott Joplin's The Entertainer (theme tune of The Sting film). 

He hasn’t heard it yet.

I bet he answers the bugger within nine rings when he does.

I know...

Evil.