Cold Caller Baiting #2

From Facebook Memories

18 June 2019 at 14:13 ·

Just found a new way of getting rid of satellite cold calls.

Phone rings

I  pick it up and say

Hello
"Hello, Miss Benton Bag?"
Who is that?
"I'm Alex, I'm calling you from Aviva ..."
Alex what?
"My name is Alex."
I know that, but you know both my first and second names, I want to know both your first and second names.

And with that, there he was gone!

Presumably the script hadn't thought to give him a suitably Anglophone surname to work with.

18 June 2019 at 14:24 ·

Second cold call, this time on the mobile from Mark of O2 (I'm sure they rang last week as well).
"Hello, are you looking to upgrade your phone or tariff at all?"

I laughed and explained that my mobile is a little Nokia held together with sellotape and when it finally dies I shall go to a shop and buy another that will cost me all of nineteen quid, but I would quite like to reduce my tariff.
"Are we giving you enough data?"
Data!  What's data?  Let me explain Mark.                My phone is so old the game is Snake, and if friends with a smartphone send me a photo all I get is a couple of little squares at the bottom of the text.
"Oh real old school!"
Yes.  Would it cost less if I went onto pay as you go rather than monthly?
"To be honest, no, and you'd have the hassle of having to go in and top up."
Well, yes, when the text with the bill comes in I say 'bugger' and then forget about it for the next 28 days.

We decided for convenience sake just to leave things as they are.