Captain Birdseye?

 From Facebook archives

 5 March 2017 at 11:39 ·

Took breakfast in the garden this morning.

Felix had me up at 05.00 so got a blast of the dawn chorus too.

5 March 2017 at 16:07 ·

Those of you familiar with Fester will know his capacity for hitting his head on any available low and not so low object.

Yesterday evening, as I was watching Say Yes To The Dress UK, there was screaming from the loft, followed by bellows of "CALM DOWN THUNDERTHIGHS" from the office.

As nothing comes between me and my guilty pleasure, I stayed put and rewound to catch the missed dialogue.  Afterwards, as nobody had come down and called an ambulance, I went upstairs to make enquiries.

Thunderthighs had banged his head on the edge one of the loft windows.   

Yes, he is so like his father; he is also like his father in screaming profanity laden blue murder at the smallest provocation.

Which make a certain person's lack of sympathy somewhat two-faced.

Talk about "Do what I say not what I do."

 5 March 2017 at 22:50 ·

Today Fester has bought a new mattress and cover for both boys' beds, a mattress for the spare bed and a headboard for Thunderthighs’ bed.  I'm going to have a busy time on Friday getting all the old ones off and bagged, and the beds all made up again.   

To say nothing of all the other sorting to make the place presentable for the delivery people!

When we were paying for the new headboard, I commented on the size of both our sons.

"Oh that will be a lot of hard work for you" said the assistant.

"Well he does the cooking" I said nodding towards Fester "which is why the boys don't like it when he works away."

"Oh, what do you do?"

"I'm retired so I don't work anymore" (lying bastard)

"I had you down for a seafaring man" says the assistant.

"It's the beard" says I "the Captain Birdseye look".