Mic Down And Up

 or more innate hostility of inanimate objects ...

You may remember, dear reader, Emojigate, when the technology of Tweeting defeated me …

Well other twenty-first century technology is just as intransigent.

When I realised I would have to take part in Zoom meetings or be useless, I acquired a webcam.  This lives clipped, with an old eraser to keep it upright, on the top edge of our computer screen (or VDU in old money).  It was cheap and the microphone on it is not very good; far too quiet and it hums a lot.

Just before Christmas the lovely men at Monkseaton Computers sorted me out with headphones with a mic attached.  Wonderful.  I facetimed Mrs Quilt and Mrs Leftfoot and Zoomed LDNE board meetings and Covens.  Thunderthighs could do his college classes remotely.  Even Fester took part in Zooms with ancient Kingsmen, interrupting over my shoulder but still, he spoke and was heard.

Every afternoon this week I’m doing a Ticbox Supporting Artistes course for and with NE14TV.  On Monday there was a preamble and then “Let’s all say a few words about ourselves, starting with Ben … Unmute yourself Ben … Oh you have unmuted … we can’t hear anything ...”

Of course it chose the most embarrassing moment to cease to function.

Yesterday morning first thing I took the headphones back down to Monkseaton Computers who replaced them, and I bought another sturdier set as spares.

Then came the fun of plugging them in and getting the computer to recognise the new mic, and make it loud enough.

Little did I know that Thunderthighs knew all along how to make it work, but was too shy to say so.  Until I got fed up of him hanging in the office doorway and barked 

“Well!  Do you know what to do?”

“Yes”

And he did.

This short clip shows what I was reduced to …