Bureaucracy

Yesterday I had a morning of bureaucracy.

My new mobile phone’s text alert is a chime so loud and arresting Fester described it as “Like f*cking Tinkerbell landing.

Tinkerbell landed at a quarter past seven in the morning with a text from Hextol, the work experience people.

"Thunderthighs is starting some gardening at a new college today.  Could you please ask him to bring his most recent DBS certificate with him this morning?  Thanks."

I arose, bleary eyed, and passed on the message (like his father Thunderthighs only uses his mobile to phone out so it is never on).

"Where is it Mum?"

So Mum goes downstairs, digs the file out of the filing cabinet and, the age of miracles not being entirely over, actually finds it.  We put it in a polypocket for safety, and it was returned to the file when he got home.

When I got back from dropping Ferretfingers off at the Rising Sun I remembered a text I’d received from the GP about his flu jab.

The text was too long for my little phone, which doesn’t do the internet, so I had to go online to read it in full.

Phone the GP and their next flu jab day is 8 October when I'm away with the Coven. Receptionist assures me anyone can take him in, so make an appointment for 10am and Fester will have to do it (I've put a note on his computer screen).

Ask about Thunderthighs; he's not at the top of the list yet so the joy of taking him along will fall to me.  That's after the joy of taking him for dental treatment again.   

And possibly his Covid booster when that comes around.

As I'm here I decide to fill in the online form to have the Covid booster at LDNE on Friday (I qualify as a Volunteer Outreach Worker).

But before I can do that I feel morally obliged to do a test and Deo Gratias it's negative.

Whilst I was in the filing cabinet looking for Thunderthighs’ I couldn't find my own DBS.  I check old emails and discover the last one was sent May 2019;  so email LDNE who send me the link for the website to apply for a new one.

Which I've done.

And printed off bills from Virgin and Bulb for proof of address.

It wasn't the morning I planned when I went to bed the night before last.

I wonder what, if anything, will be achieved today.

 

DBS = Disclosure & Barring Service, the certificate proves you haven't been arrested for anything and are probably safe to be around children and other vulnerable people.